Mama-ma ~ Of Reel and Real…

 

I am not very fond of television…to be more clearer in what I mean to say, I am not an addict to the idiot box. This doesn’t mean that I am unaware of the happenings in the reel world. Thanks to my maternal grandma (who stays with us in Bangalore), I am updated with all the tele-serial stories. I get to know exactly – who got married and re-married; who was re-born; who’s life was pushed forward by 20 odd years with a streak of grey hairs; et. al. And this I am told, no matter I have the ear-plugs with loud music banging against my ear drums. Worst, I am asked questions about why its not so-n-so or why its so-n-so in the real world. Phew! 

Being born to working parents, she (btw, I call her “mama-ma”) was the one who took care of me right till I got my sense of rights and wrongs. I love my now 72-year-old grandma no matter what, and I simply adore her – am also amazed by the fact that she still has dark black hair even at this age; while I doubt if any will be left on my head during the next appraisal cycle. 😉

The point is…she’s so engrossed into the tele-serials these days, that I feel she’s built a close relationship with all those characters; good or bad. Its like they come to see her five days a week, with their story; while she gets to see her kids (apart from my mom) only once or max. twice in a year. When she tells me all the different stories, I get to see the gleam in her eyes ; the same which I don’t see when she talks about which of her kid called her on her cell. 

Yeah, on her cell…Mama-ma’s a tech-freak and quick learner at that too…her shivering hands doesn’t make it easy for her to use the PC, else…hmm…. 😀

Apart from the cell phone (and us), the television is her favorite pass-time. No matter how sick, she is in front of the television the moment it is time for one of her daily soaps to begin with. At least we as IT professionals take rest during the weekends, but this mama-ma of mine watches those re-telecasts which are shown on Saturdays. I had once asked her, “Don’t you get bored watching it again?”. Her reply “I saw it the first time with one perspective and took the good guy’s side…on weekend’s I’m on the side of the bad guy!” simply amazed me… Being “perspective freaks” comes down the gene, I then understood!! 😛

She watches soaps on almost all Hindi channels…and even the regional Kannada ones are not spared. Phew…not an easy task to remember all those stories, as well each of those characters distinctly. Best thing is she never gets mixed up with the story line. She may forget which aunt of her had married and which one died a spinster, but she exactly knows how many times Tulsi (of the thank-god-its-stopped “Kyunki….” fame) got married and to whom, how many times she died and came back, how many times Prerna (of the damn “Kasauti…” fame) cried, et al – all in reel facts and figures.

Some times I am so amazed that I ask her questions – “Don’t you get confused with so many soaps and characters, especially when the people playing those characters change like the diapers of kids?” – A bright two-toothed smile is all I get for this question, no matter having asked her that repetitively. Mama-ma obviously holds back from saying, “No, am not an idiot like you with low or mostly no gray cells up there”!

(See, how engrossed she is while watching those soaps! :P)!! 

She’s always been an optimistic person…and that applies to her reel world relatives too, when she analyzes their cliched “situations” and pain. She always shows the characters, a ray of light that things will be fine and happy soon; much before they are handed with the scripts by the scriptwriters. 

However it is, its great to see her live her life to her hearts content and find happiness in whatever she has at her disposal. In this age, where relatives and friends kinda drift away; mama-ma’s one of those kinds, who build a totally whole new set of relatives, friends and live life like never before. Kudos to this entirely different spirit of looking at life! 😀

Of Relationships, Men-Women, Personal and Official! :)

How important is a relationship in our lives?? Be it the ones we share with our parents, friends, colleagues, teachers, bosses, BF/GF or even our spouses…each and every one of these relationships is important for us to lead a contented life without much worries.

Today at office, I made most of the invite I had got to attend a workshop on relationships conducted by V-Excel Educational Trust which was called the “Human Interface Session”! Last week I had registered for the same, and I got lucky as the registrations were limited to 140 people.
The agenda of the meet was actually regarding relationships in general….however it was decided that the speakers would concentrate more on “Man-Woman” relationships…be it personal, official, friendship related, etc.
I do not remember the actual terms used in the presentation, but all I reproduce here is the experience of having attended my first ever counselling on human relationships.

One of the most surprising things I observed was the silent manner in which 4 (3 female and 1 male) of our associates walked out with their cell phone calls as an excuse, never to return back again…after they got to hear that there would be some talks related to sexual relationships. Talk about education and Ignorance….the latter still seems to be bliss! When will we ever be comfortable to talk about something which is natural? No answer there for this one, I guess.

To begin with, there were 2 speakers Chetan and Vasudha who spoke amidst the powerpoint slides (mostly without it) and spoke randomly. There was no schematic manner which they actually followed. Chetan was the one who lead from the front while Vasudha chipped in on issues where a little stress was needed. She made most of the high pitch female frequency I would say.! 😉
The session began with differentiating the male with the female. It was an interactive session all through, and it was concluded that there was nothing wrong with males going behind women. After all it was the male instinct that ruled the roost, but this was where the human intelligence is supposed to come into picture else there would seldom be any difference between a human male and a dog. Females were said to be happy with their males as long as they got a committed one, who would carter to their needs both in kind and otherwise!
There were questions that we in the audience were supposed to ask and get cleared, if at all we had anything related to relationships in our lives. There were quite a few who came up with their questions. Some asked about themselves, while some asked on behalf of their “friends”! 😀

One guy asked about how he would stop his parents from taking charge of his life. As per him, he was being asked to follow whatever his parents wanted, even after he was now independent. He was clear in stating that this had nothing to do with his financial independence, and that is what troubled him. – He was asked to “say less when asked more”…The whole concept was to not give in to the needs of anyone which would make them crave for more. The problem had to be curbed at the roots as there was no point cutting the leaves.
A lady shared a marital problem that she was facing since she got 3 years ago. According to her, her husband was a short tempered person who would lose his cool for the smallest uncertainity. She said she used to keep her cool and walk away during the first year. The problem intensified after her child was born in the second year and when it became his object of abuse. She now had to fight for not one but two lives, for herself and her child which made her to retort back at him. – Now this was a deadlock situation…The only possible key to this situation is for one party to back out. There is no way the other party would go berseck on its own.
Another interesting problem was that of two friends. A guy said that his best friend, a gal, was too possessive of him and hated it when he spoke to other gals. I asked him if she was talking to only him or did she talk to other guys as well. He said that she used to talk to other guys and he had no problem relating to that as he was possessive! This was a clear case of preach but don’t follow. The gal should accept her friend as he was…and not expect him to just talk to her, while she talks to every Tom, Dick and Harry. If there’s a rule, it should be the same for all.
There was one parent of two daughters…one 7 year old and the other just 9 months. The problem he faced was regarding his elder daughter who now felt “less loved” post the arrival of her younger sibling. The child who so far had got all the attention of her parents, had now to share that with the baby. – The parent was adviced to dedicate 15 minutes of quality time alone with the elder daughter each day where they would talk anything and everything but keep out the advices related to this problem. The same exercise had to be followed with the younger kid, when she too would begin to understand this “sharing of love” to be unfair as the elder one now did.

The session moved on to various other topics…as to how the use of communication medium, especially the mobile phones have acted as a plus and minus point both in our lives leading to breakups as well as makeups in relationships.
There were direct questions pointed at us in the audience….
“How many of you would not mind if the guy/gal you were going to marry have had relationship(s) before??” Many including me lifted our hands…a look around, made me wonder why most of the people who had lifted their hands were the married ones??!!!!
“How many of you believe its ok to have pre-marital sex?”…as expected, none of us lifted our hands amidst the sheer pin drop silence that now prevailed. They changed the question the other way, “How many of you believe its NOT ok to be indulged in pre-marital sex?”…the silence continued though there were a few giggles now from a gang of married women who were sitting beside me.
Now why were we silent? If you ask me, I really don’t care as long as I am unaware about it…but here in this case maybe, just maybe cos we are “not used to” being involved in such a conversation when in a strange group/audience.
Vasudha clarified that it was more of an individualistic choice…One always has/gets the chance to “take the plunge”, but whether to take it or not, whether one can later live with it or not, depends entirely on the way you are brought up so far in your life.
There is nothing wrong in it, as long as you can face the fact later. But if there is chance that you might feel quilty about your act at a later stage, its wise enough to stay out of such an act.

There were also the official relationships that were discussed in detail. We were advised to stay away from relationships in office, as it was very common to get attracted since we work close to 12-14 hours in each other’s company. And if at all we do fall, it would be better if both were not in the same team.
“Would you prefer a male or female boss…say someone who is in his/her 40s?”…surprisingly even the ladies said they preferred male bosses just like the gents had said earlier. One of the reasons, as pointed out by an associate was that the lady boss finds it tough to segregate her official problems from the personal problems. May be, but I would not agree with it completely after having worked with a lady boss in her 30s for over a year and without any issues whatsoever. Infact those were the best days I would say.

Overall it was a session worth attending!! 😀

Helpless Stance

Scenes of demise, lives lost in seconds

I stand by helpless, while death beckons

Anger and fear within, devoid of sleep many lie

I stand by helpless, with every minute more seem to die

Blood and lifeless bodies, suffering none can bear

I stand by helpless, defeated by these moments of despair

Gloomy smokes engulf, life seems forever dark

I stand by helpless, while ruins leave an incessant mark

Attacks never ending, seem to leave our futures blurred

I stand by helpless, while voices for help go unheard

With every passing breath, I wonder what next

I stand by helpless, feeling unsafe and completely vexed

Grief unsurpassed, no choice but to live through

I stand by helpless, not knowing what to do

 

Lost…

Living on the edge, lost in the race…
Pain all inside, smile on the face…
Trying to forget, every breath leaves a tear….
The distance apart, far away if not near…

The forbidden memories, flashes at a blink…
Grapes sour again? It just doesn’t sink…
Etched in the mind, that touch of the skin…
That looking back, the smile with a grin….

The blocked mind, nerves torn apart…
The broken heart, beats refuse to start…
So not lonely, not so alone yet…
Move on said some, there’s time to sunset…

More days to come, rising with the sun…
Other races to be run, just one to be won…
Music relieves pain, head banging to rock…
Time alone heals, counting ticks of the clock…

Mumbai Massacre and Political Harakiri

An entire nation woke up to the worst ever terror attack it has seen in so many years.
There are parts of the society still in deep slumber, more out of choice than anything else. Probably they know that they are a bunch of good for nothing politicians who cannot ever do anything positive for this nation.

When maniacal terrorists were shooting away to glory whomever they spotted and when they had taken innocent people hostage, the state government took their own sweet time to bring in the NSG and the army folks. By that time any naïve terrorist could have established monopoly and power wherever he pleases.

Each of our hearts pains with sorrow and anger all at once seeing the devastation that these 15 odd terrorists (as claimed by the Maharashtra PM, who were killed in the encounters) could cause to a population of around 3 billion. There are questions that keeps popping up in my mind.
What are elections held for?
What did these politicians think they are voted and given power for?
Are they of the opinion that the seats they occupy are a blind way to make money?
Are they of the opinion that giving out freebies and winning elections are just for increasing their popularity and status?
Even among such disastrous situations, we found these “well meaning” politicians making way for their own profit and election needs by playing yet another blame game. We find Narendra Modi coming down to Mumbai in the pretext of lending support to the mumbaikars, and in turn finding an opportunity to blame the central government for its poor administration. I wonder what he was doing when the Godhra incident shook our nation a few years ago. I guess he thinks he is doing a great service to the nation!

Between all this, for duty sake we find our Prime Minister issuing a speech to the nation, saying the age old dialog of eradicating terrorism. Now I really wonder if terrorism is going to be eradicated by the mere utterance of those words!
The same government had given out their elaborate plans of police reform a few years ago. The local police were indeed being so effective fighting the terrorists with high tech weapons with his lathi and a hand pistol! Look at the state of our security personnel.

How will they provide security even if they wished for it?
Does it take an attack of this stature for the government to realize that how backward we are in the amenities and weapons that we provide our policemen with?
In a country which is being targeted so often by negative forces is it not wise to set up a sophisticated crisis infrastructure and maximum support and ammunition to the policemen and security personnel? How long are they going to try and safeguard a nation of such huge population with miniscule weapons as they presently have?
When security has become such a huge issue at present, the policemen and the army men in our country have to beg for more salary and perks to keep their family living. Is this the homage we pay to the people who sacrifice their lives without second thoughts to keep us all safe in our beds?
Is this the way we treat the people to whom we are going to give responsibility of our lives and futures?
After every such crisis, the politicians are smart enough to give money to all the soldiers/policemen who lost their lives. And now if families are refusing to take in the politician’s money, it just goes to show how much dissatisfaction and anger each of the families have towards the government and politicians.
News is doing rounds that the government had actually got clues that the Taj and the Oberoi were targets of an upcoming terror attack. But the ever sleepy government discounted it as mere rumours and went on with its normal (non existent) work! I heard on one of the television news channels, an MP of the ruling party saying that not all information is “actionable information”. This is ridiculous. I fail to understand what loss could the government have incurred if they had made at least minimum preparations so as to combat such an attack?

Wouldn’t it have saved them from such shame and also saved the people of the country from such devastation and sorrow?
Politicians actually have the audacity to defend themselves on television even after so much has happened?
I wonder if they are actually fools or they are pretending to be.
There is another question that is burning in my mind.
Is our nation so backward that we do not have dedicated police booths in all our railway stations and airports?
I am sure the terrorists wouldn’t have gotten out alive from the Chatrapati Sivaji terminal if they were police booths (with alert police officials and of course some good enough arms and ammunition for support!) around.
Is security in huge five star hotels as the Taj so weak that arms and ammunition could be smuggled in?
These are places the high class people and the politicians themselves frequently visit. When politicians normally go around the streets of the country surrounded by more security personnel than the number that entered Taj to carry out the operation, did they not realize that it was a piece of cake to breach any kind of security (if any existed) in these high end places?
When there were umpteen blasts and attacks on various Indian cities before, had these politicians never woken up and realized that something was missing in their governance and the basic security of the nation?
Is it going to take much worse attacks to break open the slumber of the politicians and make them get into action?

The only good and sensible thing that has happened after such massive crisis is that our Home Minister finally took responsibility and resigned his post. I frankly think he should have done that much before, and I wonder if he is doing it now just to gain sympathy. Whatever it is, one bad one goes, and there comes another in his place.
Is the political scene in India ever going to change?

Hello buddies!!

Who are we?
A growing group of friends who like to read and write blogs.

What we do?
As for a living, we are geeks…I develop…Nive tests…and yes, it does work! 😀

Why the blog?
We like to write…on variety of topics and poems too…

What do we write about?
We are concerned about the nonsense that goes on in India in the name of politics, democracy and basically Life.
So we are here to post our views and also to do some controlled bakwaas.

What can you as a reader do?
Probably agree to what we say…hehe…or even maybe disagree to our dismay. And oye, ya leave a comment to let us know! 😀